You can't be fat and happy

NatureNymph

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Hey girls, saw this online and thought you all would be interested. I don't know if this exact article has already been posted, but it is completely how I feel. With all the fat pride and everything, it's not about even the exterior looks, but how it feels to have uncomfortable fat, rolls and bulges:(
you can't actually be truly happy in your own skin if it hurts, hurts to move, wear regular clothes or be active. I know none of the girls on this site are actually classified my normal people as fat, but I just thought it was refreshing to read a random average person defy these 'fat norms'. The comments are a bit bitter on this lady I think, telling her they're fat and happy etc:rolleyes:
anyways, tell us what you think!
:kiss:

http://www.dailyhiit.com/hiit-blog/hiit-life/cant-fat-happy/
 

Exquisite

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When I was at my fattest, my thighs rubbed together and it was actually really painful, I'd get rashes, etc...so fat people who are all "I have no problems at all!" ... yeah right. As someone who has been there, I know they are in some sort of physical pain.

I think they get so used to it they adapt and might think they are 'happy' but really, they've forgotten what real happiness feels like!
 

Lolita

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When I was at my fattest, my thighs rubbed together and it was actually really painful, I'd get rashes, etc...so fat people who are all "I have no problems at all!" ... yeah right. As someone who has been there, I know they are in some sort of physical pain.

I think they get so used to it they adapt and might think they are 'happy' but really, they've forgotten what real happiness feels like!
To be honest I don't think that because you thighs rub together you can't be happy :wtf:

Grantes, being fat does present some discomforts, as you explained with your thighs rubbing together. But really, except that, can it really equate with unhappiness? I think it is just a minor inconvenient (then again it does depend on how exactly overweight you are) that shouldn't be made a big deal out of.

Of course I understand some people delude themselves into thinking ''oh I'm happy with my weight, what can I do anyway?''. When deep down, they envy the thin girls and wish they had the willpower to become like them.

Those cases form the grand majority of 'fat' people. However I genuinely think that some people don't really care about their size, they just live a happy and fulfilling life, maybe they have a lot of friends, go out, have fun etc. etc. without worrying about their weight!

I can even understand women who love their 'curves'. Yes I find 'curves' (aka fat rolls everywhere and in the wrong places) disgusting, but maybe some people are actually fond of big breasts, big butts etc.

Honestly, I think we go to far into thinking that everyone wants to be thin/skinny. Some people are just happy the way they are, and actually like a bit flesh!

Whatever floats their boat I guess :p
 
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ZeroDiet

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When I was at my fattest, my thighs rubbed together and it was actually really painful, I'd get rashes, etc...so fat people who are all "I have no problems at all!" ... yeah right. As someone who has been there, I know they are in some sort of physical pain.

I think they get so used to it they adapt and might think they are 'happy' but really, they've forgotten what real happiness feels like!
To play devil's advocate, my spine digs painfully into the back of the chair when I sit, I'm constantly cold, and my blood pressure drops when I restrict so I get dizzy if I jump up... it comes with the territory. I'm used to all of this by now. Everyone has problems, regardless of weight, although I do think the MAJORITY of fat people are unhappy. It's impossible to not worry about your health, and once you see it going downhill everything unravels.
 

espressoenthusiast

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To play devil's advocate, my spine digs painfully into the back of the chair when I sit, I'm constantly cold, and my blood pressure drops when I restrict so I get dizzy if I jump up... it comes with the territory. I'm used to all of this by now. Everyone has problems, regardless of weight, although I do think the MAJORITY of fat people are unhappy. It's impossible to not worry about your health, and once you see it going downhill everything unravels.

this is so true! At lowest weights, there are definitellyyyy physical discomforts. However, at least it looks nice, and doesn't make you die about 20 years prematurely :lol: The only thing that upsets me is that no one seems to just leave other peoples' bodies and weight alone! Why does it matter to anyone else but me?
 

espressoenthusiast

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Also, I loved one of the *few* good comments:

"As a former "fat person" I wholly agree with this post. Because deep down inside there will always be that want-to-be-fit person trying desperately to come out. It's a no brainer, being fit, being healthy and knowing you look the part is all it took for me to shed years of self hatred and gain back confidence that was cringing and hiding behind my layers of fat. Change came to me, not because of social media, peer pressure of any other external force, but from the sheer need deep inside myself. My change came late for me, I am in my 50's but nevertheless it came. I have never been happier despite all the years of being fat that I am no longer."
 

Exquisite

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Adding to this discussion, I think a lot of fat people think 'once I lose the weight I'll be happy' but as someone who has been through the (partial) journey, I can say that I know longer tell myself that once I'm thin I'll be happier. I think happiness comes from loving yourself and having a fulfilling life where you feel you contribute something to society. In my opinion, a truly overweight person (not just chubby, but like, medically obese) can't love themselves. If they can, great, but I just don't see how, because (in my opinion) the overeating is caused by the hatred of self.

The people that say they have no health problems at all despite being obese are completely lying. But as @ZeroDiet points out, being skinny has problems too.
 
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espressoenthusiast

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To be honest I don't think that because you thighs rub together you can't be happy :wtf:

Grantes, being fat does present some discomforts, as you explained with your thighs rubbing together. But really, except that, can it really equate with unhappiness? I think it is just a minor inconvenient (then again it does depend on how exactly overweight you are) that shouldn't be made a big deal out of.

Of course I understand some people delude themselves into thinking ''oh I'm happy with my weight, what can I do anyway?''. When deep down, they envy the thin girls and wish they had the willpower to become like them.

Those cases form the grand majority of 'fat' people. However I genuinely think that some people don't really care about their size, they just live a happy and fulfilling life, maybe they have a lot of friends, go out, have fun etc. etc. without worrying about their weight!

I can even understand women who love their 'curves'. Yes I find 'curves' (aka fat rolls everywhere and in the wrong places) disgusting, but maybe some people are actually fond of big breasts, big butts etc.

Honestly, I think we go to far into thinking that everyone wants to be thin/skinny. Some people are just happy the way they are, and actually like a bit flesh!

Whatever floats their boat I guess :p
you're wonderful/read my mind :highfive: Skinny isn't for everyone--hell it is for me, but for so many people it isn't. What matters is that we all have the choice to look how we want (without the 'skinny is gross/anorexic/weird' remarks or similarly, the 'fat people are all miserable deep down' comments as well) I care much more about intellect and character than weight
 

Intrinsicality

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I think.....fat people are generally dissatisfied , defensive and to a level in denial.

Examples:

1) My Guy BFF from highschool; super awesome and big personality, always jovial, sharp wit and always very well dressed but was very overweight. A serious foodie.

Anyway, he is as polite and as PC as anyone would get.....fast-forward heartbreak, and he has lost a TON of weight!!!! He is, for the first time, slim-average. Which is saying ALOT!!! And he has always had a cute face, so he looks good!

And Boy....let me tell you, HE MAKES FUN OF FAT PEOPLE NOW!!!!!
He has clear disdain for them. I was so shocked and pleasantly amused!
Is he happier? Yes!!!

2) An aunt of mine; also hit the overweight BMI at the doc's ....and I saw her a week ago after some 3 months? She has lost like 40 lbs!!! She looks legit, like a DIFFERENT PERSON!!! And seriously works out hard everyday, I am SO proud of her!!! She is SO CURIOUS and wants to learn learn learn. We were having some very interesting conversations, and there seems to be SUCH a paradigm shift; before she just meekly accepted her 'body' and she admitted quite apologetically that she would sometimes call skinny girls anorexic!
Her confidence is up like a 100% and she is SO focused!!! Is she happier? Yes!!

3) Fat sister-in-law....a pseudo-intellect, full of excuses, full of self-limiting beliefs, low self-esteem, has a husband that embarasses her in public with things like "oh, look how skinny that woman is!!!". Just LAZY. She is having health and heart troubles. And she JUST hit 30. Her fb is FULL of pro-fat BS. Is she happy? NO.


So unless if you live in a part of the world with limited contact with the outside world and live a heavily sedentary life, with a culture that considers that as the ideal beauty? If you are fat, most societies send you rather palpable signals of how it views it as less than desirable. And it WILL at some point make you feel like crap about yourself, apart from you the health-problems you've amassed due to bad health and bad choices.
 

Tabbynya

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I agree. My mother has always been fat, always overeating when life was hard for our family. Seeing her obese during my growing up was all the motivation I needed to stay slim, and once she retired and lost most of the stress, she dieted.

She's happy now, it's like having a new mum. But all her medical issues from being obese most of her life are still there.
 

NatureNymph

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Wow I agree with all you you guys - I can see both sides. I know that ultimately, your size should not determine your happiness, as many people tell us happiness comes from the inside, and as others have pointed out, not everyone wants to be skinny.

There are health problems at both ends of the spectrum. I definately think it also depends on that person's "range" of 'fatness' I guess; like for me it would have been above average where I felt flabby, unfit, fat rubbing together etc, whereas others comming from the overly obese section, who then lose a ton of weight, would then feel happy and good at that 'above average' space I felt unhappy in.

People can definately fool themselves into thnkng they're happy when they might have not felt their own form of 'true' happiness even. :hmm: this gets very physiological... there have been brain scans done etc. that shows people with lower dopamine (feel-good hormone) etc. when they are depressed, which then can result to over/under eating.

So unless you're eating a shit ton without kidding yourself you hate yourself, being fat gets in the way of happiness. I think of the scary fat humans in WALL-E now...:run: but this is all, again, one opinion :grin:
 

LisaBabyMJ

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I hate it when they take up the whole sidewalk or aisle do you can't cut in front of them and not only that but they waddle sooo ridiculously damn slooooow and when you do manage to sneak past their jiggly fat rolls they give you a dirty look as if you're the one being rude...ummm don't cause such a traffic jam in the first place and either get off the lane or get in a pick up truck